Social media and social connection

How did we lose social connection through use of social media? And can we get some of the human connection back?

Social media and lost social connection

The launch of social media

In 2007 I joined the ranks of facebook after much resistance to the many many invitations I had received over a year or so. What finally wore me down? I had been living far from many of my friends and family for years. In fact, because I’ve grown up in a transient “forces family“ I’d always had friends and family that I lived far away from.

My dad was of a member of the federal police force and both of my grandfathers were air force. My girls’ dad joined the armed forces when my oldest was just a toddler. We moved around the country a lot. I had friends in the town I attended secondary school, and across the country in the town where my first daughter was born. Family were scattered from coast to coast to coast and abroad.

Connecting across the miles

This new-to-the-world platform seemed like a great way to reconnect with some of those friends. When I joined it was still very much a place for university, students and graduates, but soon became much more broadly used.

It was really fun seeing what our connections across the nation, continent, and eventually – the world, were up to. Photos of friends’ and cousins’ children, homes, and favourite activities. Status updates of new jobs and other accomplishments were interesting and made the world seem a little bit smaller in scale.

But it wasn’t until the opportunity to reconnect with a few long-ago once very close friends that I had lost touch with came about that I truly embraced social media.

Lost social connections

It’s ironic. That which once gave us an opportunity to rekindle old friendships and connections has since become one of the largest contributors to lost human connection. While, I haven’t completely abandoned the platform – as I have with some other social media networks – it is not a space that enhances my connections much anymore. At least, not in any significant way. The truth is that the growth of the network and its monetization harms human connection more than than it enhances.

Much like popularity contests of high school, the quest for likes and reactions – collecting friends and followers – the filtered view of our lives – our living for the selfie moments – and the fact that news feeds are filled more with sponsored and suggested posts, than with the activity of our actual friends… has caused me to spend less and less time on these platforms. Even more ironically – the rekindled friendships that caused me to embrace social media have once again become dying embers.

social media and the dieing embers of social connection

Today social media has been found to be the cause of anxiety and depression among many – but especially among teens.

So what is there to do about it when it has become the norm to meet people online, rather than an in person? Is there a way that we can go back to putting these platforms to used to enhance our social connections?

In-person connection and in-between online interactions

I volunteer with our community theater and I’m part of a production about once/year. Generally, a cast works together for about 4 to 6 months before the show goes on stage. Many of the crew are involved in the background and then begin interacting with the cast later in the production. Once the show wraps up, we have a big cast party, then set strike the following day. Then we all move on, until the next show.

Something different happened recently. I believe it is partly to do with how the group used facebook messenger to remain connected. At some point conversations moved from our facebook group to a group chat in messenger. The chat remained active after the show wrapped up in November.

There were a few members of the cast involved in another production, and many of the November group made plans to attend the show together in March. That evolved into dinner and the show, then an after party for the November group. About 20 of us went together, and those of us who were part of the March show joined us at the after party later. The party host commented about how different this particular group has been in that the connection remained active long after the show ended.

Social media is a tool that can enhance connections

It got me thinking about how that group chat made the ongoing connection easier. Moving that conversation out of the facebook group where algorithms played a part in what and when we saw others’ posts made a difference. Carrying on a running conversation that any member could be part of much like happens in a room filled with people… a conversation influenced only by the participants – without ads, or suggested posts, or an algorithm deciding what was relevant for us to see and when… Those frequent interactions in the group chat, enhanced our relationships while we had an ultimate plan to reconnect in person.

Intentional use of social media can enhance social connection

I’ll be honest, I haven’t been a very active participant in that group chat. I’ve become so that I spend less and less time on my devices and in social media networks. But I appreciated that I could jump in when I wanted. That there was no extraneous noise. And that we would all make opportunities to connect once again in person.

Occasionally, the conversation headed in a direction that didn’t interest me. And I could treat it much like I do at a house party. I could mute the messenger notifications for a while, so I wasn’t flooded with talk about sports events, or I could engage in the side topics that interested me more.

We can use technology in an intentional way to enhance our social connections.

I only wish there was a way to move the needle back in the other direction – where our news feeds are filled with updates from the people, groups, and yes, even businesses we choose to engage with – rather than an algorithm choosing for us.

Let’s build a more intentional socially connected online world. Together.

How can you use Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, TikTok, or another app to enhance your social connections? Drop me a note in the comments!

Join us for a FREE five day challenge to make more authentic social connections!

For more information on how to develop more authentic connections:

Drop me a note in the comments below, or connect with me on Instagram, or Twitter @ceilidhontherun, email me at trish at trishblogs dot com, or use my contact form.

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Starting your sidehustle momentum, using Pinterest

Do you find yourself running in circles?

Are you working hard at a sidehustle and getting nowhere?

*This post contains affiliate links. TrishBlogs receives a small percentage of compensation for purchases made via these links, at no cost to the consumer.

I have been doing a lot of learning about how to finally go somewhere with a/my sidehustle. I have been blogging/social media marketing and playing around online for years. I have built klout and have fun getting to know other bloggers. But I have failed to monetize it yet. I have pursued many ideas. Taken courses. Read books and blogs. Followed gurus. But I just haven’t taken bold enough action to actually be going somewhere.

Pinterest Ninja

One of my areas that I have been challenged by is Pinterest. And along comes Megan’s ebook/course! I noticed her posts about Pinterest Ninja and started following her. I finally decided one day to purchase and see how it/she might help me!

Click for access to Pinterest Ninja

Megan’s book is easy to read and tips are easy to follow. My favourite thing about Pinterest Ninja is that so much of her advice helps in general with building traffic and an audience, not just using Pinterest. Simple tips about finding popular keywords, for instance.

I love that she continues to update and offer more resources to current and future readers.

I have been using these tips to monetize my blog and build my audience. In fact I had my first payout from an affiliate in the last week since doing so!

I have been a lifestyle blogger for years, with a focus on Making Change in the world. My passion is for social justice; mental health; and women, children & families.  I have always been known to speak up/out when others aren’t always willing. I share personal stories that others often keep hidden. It is my hope that my stories will help someone else to see that they are not alone.  I want to help others have a larger voice in whatever challenges they may face. And to use those challenges to Be the Change they want.


I am launching an online coaching service.

While not limited to – my areas of strength are in: parenting/childcare and family; as well as mental health; overall health & wellness; social media marketing for the small business / not-quite-luddite; and curating photos to tell your/their story. I am a generalist at heart, which is why I studied Social Work after Early Childhood Education, Psychology and English.

Pinterest Ninja is helping me expand my reach, and stop circling my target.

If I can help you make change in your world, I can be contacted via most Social Media channels, my blog  or old-fashioned email at


Drop me a note in the comments below, or connect with me on Twitter @ceilidhontherun or email me at trish at trishblogs dot com!

I invite you to subscribe to my blog using one of the options available on my page (email, rss, Google Connect, like my page on Facebook, etc.)

If you enjoyed this post, please do like/s

What is Coaching with Trish and how does it work?

Have you been considering coaching to get some help with setting and/or reaching your goals?

Coaching is a great way to improve your chances of success!

Many people have heard about life and/or health coaching but aren’t really sure how it works. So, if that is you, you are not alone. Just about anyone can benefit from coaching, including other coaches.

Coaching helps individuals and groups to establish goals in different areas – whether it be life in general, career, business, finances, health and/or fitness, etc.  With the help of your coach YOU will determine what you want to work on. You will set goals that are reachable, and YOU will decided how to work towards them.

So what does your coach do?Trish - Coaching for Change

Before answering that, I must share with you one thing that coaching is NOT. Coaching is not therapy. If during your coaching sessions, therapy is determined as one of the resources required to meet your goals, I will assist with the process of finding the right therapist for you.

As your coach my goal is to help you work through that process. I will ask you the questions that will point you in the right direction. I will assist with researching both the issues/presenting obstacles and how to overcome them. I will help you to find the resources needed to be successful. And I will walk you through the process of setting the goals and objectives required to meet those goals.

Now once you have a clear idea of where you are wanting to be, and how you want to get there, we will decide together what support you require in moving forward. Primarily I will be your accountability partner. I will be looking for updates and helping to assess how your progress is coming. I will work with you to determine if there are new goals of reaching higher and/or maintaining the successes achieved.

How long will you need to work with a coach?

The answer to how long is completely up to you. You get to decide when we are done. You also get to decide how flexible the accountability will be and what will happen if you do not hold up your end of the bargain. Have you reached the goals you hoped to? Is the coaching relationship successfully assisting your journey?  Have you determined new goals to work on? Many people work with coaches for at least several months. Some people work with coaches for years and move through varying stages and or issues as they go.

I will “meet” with you via email, or virtual chat (text or audio) on a weekly basis (or otherwise, as determined in your sessions). I will help you navigate through a series of questions and conversations. The first session is a get to know you opportunity about where you are today and where you think you’d like to be headed, or what issue(s) you’d like to work on. This will also give you an opportunity to learn a little more about me and whether I would make a good fit for the coaching you are looking for.

What will be expected of you?

During sessions you will find yourself sharing/talking a lot more than listening. And you will be the decision-maker on this path.

In between our sessions you will have assignments, determined by you – with my assistance. I will be looking for an update during or prior to our next session(s). I may offer to provide resources to help with your journey. Most importantly, we will determine outcomes that will help us to know if you have achieved the desired objective and/or goal. And we will set a timeline by which you will work on them.

Coaching should not be stressful, but will be a bit uncomfortable. The only way to achieve change is to step outside of your comfort zone and do something that is at least a little bit of a stretch for you.

We will also determine what your learning style is and what will help you to be motivated to make the necessary changes to move forward. If this involves some sort of reward(s), we’ll establish what those rewards should be, and later, if they worked for your desired outcome. That way we will be able to set effective outcomes and rewards (or consequencWellness, parenting and social media coachinges if appropriate) going forward.

So what can we work on in our coaching sessions?


My areas of specialty are health and wellness; parenting/family/relationships/child care/and child development; social media marketing; curating family stories; and more. That being said I am able to work with you on just about anything that you identify as being important. My role is to ask you the questions that will help YOU to identify WHAT and HOW to work on the issue(s)/goal(s).

If you are ready to get started, or would like speak with me for a short consult to learn more, please complete my contact form. Or… you can join us on Facebook for a closed discussion about how coaching works.

I look forward to working with you!